Time Management for Artist Moms: The Secret Power of Surrender

Me at my desk. No tidying for the blog photo!

It’s that moment when I’m still in my  jammy pants, sipping my second “free” cup of coffee, laptop balanced on the record player, while my son colors beside me at his small desk in our “music room”. It’s when a check from a client gets delivered straight to my door. It’s my little boy’s joyful “No show tonight!” as he kisses my cheek, thrilled that Mama will be home for bedtime.

As a theatrical artist and marketer for the arts, I’m constantly rethinking the worth of my time. My husband, a chef, has a structured schedule—out the door at 7:30 a.m., home at 5:30 p.m., weekends intact. My week, though, is not a tidy five days on, two days off. It’s a chaotic mix of hours, moments, and deadlines.

And here’s the truth I’ve learned: the key to managing time, paying the bills, cherishing my career, and loving my family isn’t about hustle—it’s about surrender.

"You can bike anywhere in Seattle in 40 minutes," I used to brag in my twenties, whipping through the city on my purple fixed-gear. That wasn’t entirely true—Magnolia, anyone? —but it was true ENOUGH. Those rides gave me the illusion of control over my time, the weather, and Seattle’s never-ending hills. 

This mindset served me well as a hustling young artist without a car, and it extends to parenthood – where the insurmountable hills are bedtime, work the next day, and connecting with my partner in between.

What is the new secret to my time management?

Building in 40 minutes to sit at my desk, head in my hands, and flailing.

That’s right. Flailing—what looks like wasted time—is where the magic happens. Plays get written, songs composed, spreadsheets tackled, babysitters scheduled, Christmas gifts ordered, insurance claims filed, and family FaceTime calls made (that was a little snapshot of my to-do list today). Everything I need to do, and a million things I didn’t plan for, grows out of those quiet, unstructured moments where I stop pretending I’ve got it all figured out.

This month, I’ve pushed a lot of my computer work to the back burner in favor of raking wet, cold leaves into paper bags. I’ve taken on a few side hustles for extra cash, helping friends with their yards while they’re away for the holiday.

Out there on my hands and knees in the dirt, I surrender to how much time simple tasks at home take me. I could spend those grounding moments beating myself up—worrying that I’m not efficient enough, that I should be doing something related to my art that makes money. Or, I can choose to have faith that after 40 minutes (give or take), I’ll get back to my to-do list online. And when the sun sets at 4 p.m. (thank you, PNW winter), I’ll trade all of it for snuggles and bedtime stories.

I hear you. I too, feel the panic in my throat when I have a sitter for only 4 hours, all of which need to be devoted to work. But let’s be real: Even if I tell myself I’m going to chug away the whole time, that 40 minutes still slips in. So go ahead! Open the door. Add the flail to the table.

Time management for artist moms isn’t about having a pristine schedule. It’s about trusting that flailing, surrendering, and even procrastinating is part of the creative process. It’s about finding balance in the mess. And it’s about remembering that no matter how chaotic your days feel, there’s always time to savor what matters most.

My son plays at checking off a to-do list.